When do you talk about money
She is almost 4 and being that her bday is coming this month (i see a mushy post in my future) the preparations got into full gear.
There is nothing like getting presents (maybe sex but this also a present so…) and she has a list of them.
We are using the dvr (like tivo) to watch tv so we don’t see commercials, however she loves watching kids commercials.
Before it used to be "hey Abba look its so pretty" an more along this line but a few weeks ago she saw
THE DOLL - she talks, she sings and most important she calls her Mommy - Being big sister - they hit the spot.
if you have girls you’ll recognize the following conversation (which occurs every month/ every visit to target/disney store) -
1st one - you have to see this
(it starts slowly)
Me - yes buba (honey, what now)
1st one - its ariel/jasmin/cinderrela/aurora/… New Dress/shoes/earings…
Me - wow its beautiful (i know what’s coming)
1st one - can you buy the new ariel/jasmin/cinderrela/aurora/… New Dress/shoes/earings… ???
Me - but you already have that (resistence is futal)
1st one - abba, no I don’t
And it goes on and on and on and …
the exact conversation happened while we were in merchandise land.
Now, am I supposed to explain to her about the difference in currency that a dress
of a princess (pick you favorite) costs exactly half at toys r us ?
Do you give up ?
Why can't she have every toy she wants ? because life is not fair ? that’s horrible lesson in life
which I'm not going to put in her mind.
Help me think for a second beyond the box of regular sentences and excuses we come up with.
Anyone ?
פורסם בתאריך 5 בNovember 2006 ע"י
תחת נושאים: Family, Life
Hmm … well, let’s see -we can't have everything we want because then the things we do have seem less special and we don't appreciate them. That’s a hard concept to impart to a kid but it’s true isn't it? I know if I had like 10 houses I wouldn't appreciate any of them as much as I appreciate the 1 I have now. I think.
I try to get my son hooked on the idea of something bigger that is worth waiting for. It took a long time and it’s usually closer to Christmas when he lightens up on the shopping habits.
Time to give that girl a budget. If she’s tuned in enough to ask for stuff, she’s ready to learn that resources are limited and that normal people have to pick and choose what they will buy based on an awareness of those limitations. It’s not unfair that we can't have everything we want - it’s life.
I'd give her small chores she can do to earn cash and then have her bring her own money to the toy store. She'll soon see that it takes work to get new ariel/jasmin/cinderrela/aurora/… New Dress/shoes/earings. That is one of the most priceless lessons you can teach a kid - that and earning your own money means you have more freedom to make choices about what you want to spend.
I would also start a savings plan - a certain percentage of each dollar needs to be saved for college or some other part of her adult life. There are some on-line bank accounts (Orange savings accounts for example) that have high interest rates and no minimum balance. It wouldn't be the worst thing for her to learn the basics of investing to earn interest - and to take pride in the accomplishment of putting away little bits of money and watching it grow.
If this were me, I would probably work out some type of allowance and have her save up for "her wants".
We have friends who practically get their kids everything they want, and they don't take care of their stuff.
When I grew up, I only got stuff on my birthday and Christmas. And when my Grandmother would sneak in something cool once in a while.
I found a good way to deal with those conversations. Instead of just reacting with "No" and "We can't buy it because…" like I used to, I now acknowledge what they are saying and agree with them for a minute: "Wow, that IS cool. Looks like a lot of fun! Maybe we can put that on your Christmas list…" Once you acknowledge their thoughts and feelings, they often move on easily to another subject.